Zoro's Noontime Swim
by Saiyan Angie
Summary: When someone calls you nakama, it is the ultimate compliment. It doesn't mean, however, that you can count on others to save you from your own stupidity... unless you're a Strawhat pirate, of course!Nakamaship.
1. With or Without You

A brilliant beam of sunlight danced down from the sky, speckling the sea. It would have been beautiful, admired, and maybe even written about in poetry if it hadn't been serving another purpose. Namely, it was burning all on the deck of the Going Merry mercilessly. Once again, this wouldn't have been a problem if it didn't hurt so much.

Nami looked outside from inside the kitchen. The heat, even indoors, made her face flush. Frustrated, she moved her quill too quickly on the map. The ink fell on the map with an uneven streak, causing the navigator to swear. Black smeared what had been her third try at the chart in the past two hours. She grimaced, sweat trickling down her face.

Nothing could have made that moment more miserable, she had decided. Perhaps she spoke aloud, for the resident blonde-haired cook soon came to her side, rubbing her shoulders as he did so. ('Aaaah! Nami-swan is so lovely when she's miserable!') Of course, after allowing said action to continue for ten seconds, she promptly decided it was unacceptable and stormed back into the open.

Luffy, who had been waiting outside the galley for some time, bolted in as the door unlocked. Nami was too chagrinned to care. If only Sanji had been so lucky… A colorful string of curse-words filled the noon-time air. Predictably, it was soon followed by the sound of the captain's pained howls. The orange-haired teenage girl gripped her face tightly. If it were possible to have died of annoyance, she would have keeled over within about twenty minutes of stepping onto the Going Merry for the first time.

As if to spite her, a smooth female voice called out from what little shade there was near the mast.

"Come and sit for a while, navigator-san." she invited from inside some book, shifting her position in the chair so that Nami could perch on the edge. The cartographer's eyes narrowed.

Nami was about to protest, but several slender hands appeared on the deck and carried her to the appointed place. She sulked. Robin smiled at this, but only a little.

"This weather is nice, isn't it?" the older woman commented carefully, setting down a glass that had once been filled with ice. Only specks of frozen water remained in the harsh rays. Before nodding insincerely, Nami eyed it dubiously. Robin smiled again, and then continued. "It's a perfect day for a swim. I'm quite happy that Swordsman-san noticed. He was quite enthusiastic to have leapt in fully-clothed."

Nami's brain, slowed by the heat, took a moment to register the meaning of the historian's words. Zoro? Swimming? He'd be sleeping. Especially in weather like this. She tilted her head, her orange bangs stuck to her damp face, studying the railing where the green-haired idiot usually slept.

Three swords rested hap-hazardly against the railing of the ship, gleaming dangerously from their sheathes. That wasn't unusual. The missing chunk from the ship where Zoro would have been leaning, on the other hand, was. Still somewhat uncomprehending from the heat, Nami took a double-take. She was sure she was sleeping. It was probably some sort of fever-dream. Yeah, that was it. _ Zoro's stupid, but he's not THAT stupid…_ So, she shut her eyes.

Tentatively, she opened her right one. No Zoro. Hole in the railing. _Damn._

Comprehension finally dawning on the young woman, Nami raced over to the gap in the swordsman-support system. The ocean below was peaceful, warm, and steaming.

Her eyes swept over the surface. There was a lack of green-haired moron, but she was content to wait. He had probably just gone for a dive. She hoped that the 'marimo' enjoyed it, because she was going to kill him for alarming her. Seconds passed by, marked by sweat dripping down her neck. They stretched out like hours, and annoyance turned to nervousness, and nervousness to full-blown fear.

"**Zoro!"** she shouted, using the tone that struck fear into any of her debtor's hearts. She waited for inevitable reply, but no green hair popped towards the surface. Though, in a twist of irony, a wild marimo did. It was too far away for her to see, though, and therefore had nothing to do with this. Her eyes merely beheld the sea below. She called his name out again into the waves of the Grand Line. It was vast. It was blue. It was Zoro-less. _Damn._


	2. Bichapicle

Roronoa Zoro was having a very, very bad day. One, to say the least, that was worthy of making the top twenty on his personal list. He remembered only a few of them, but this was definitely up there. After all, it had been a day filled with something he absolutely hated; questions he didn't know the answer to. How was he supposed to know? What great being decided he should have been able to deduce that waking up early that morning would have been a bad thing? How was HE predestined to realize that Ussop had been on watch 48 hours straight? Should he have been aware that the ship's repairs would be affected by this? Was Luffy honestly that hungry? Did Robin know she made an annoying throaty sound when she finished a chapter? Okay, maybe the last one had no impact whatsoever on the situation at hand. He was drowning whether or not the historian purred when she finished a section of her book. It mattered to him, though. It was part of the problem in his mind.

Bubbles flew out the swordsman's mouth. He needed air, but the currents were stifling him. Breathing, he realized then, was something he had taken very much for granted. Everyone did it, but until they couldn't, they really didn't notice what a luxury it was. Perhaps fish did, and that was why they attacked _Merry_ at regular intervals. Fish, of course, made him realize that his lungs weren't his only internal organ needing attention. A low, rumbling sound through the water confirmed that he was hungry, as well.

Flailing, thrashing, and attempting to swim upwards, Zoro could only do one thing. Namely, he cursed the world and went unconscious.

Now, the planet, land, or even the Grand Line didn't tend to notice when it had an ambitious sailor in its turbulent grasp, but usually someone else did. Often this wasn't a thing to be thankful for, because the person who knew their comrade had fallen overboard was often the one that pushed him. For example, if the ero-cook had been the one to push the green-haired warrior off the boat, there probably would have been no call for backup whatsoever. A smirk maybe, or a passing glance and nod at another crewmember, but never a full-blown cry of 'man overboard'. That was strictly for emergencies that happened as the result of an enemy's assault or a freak accident. So, predictably, almost any captain was afraid of the phrase.

The great Straw-Hat Luffy was no exception.

Monkey D. Luffy was not immune to words. Any of his nakama would probably be able to inform someone ignorant of this fact by uttering something about a meat shortage. The temper tantrum that would follow tended to leave the pupil in a state of trauma, but the knowledge would be shared. It was a childish fear of the boy-captain; one of those that were conducive of hiding in a corner. The fear of the phrase that Nami was about to yell, to the contrary, was more of a mortal terror. The kind that makes even the strongest hearts stop.

"**MAN OVERBOARD!**" the navigator shrieked, still frantically searching the surface for any sign of her missing nakama.

The effect was instantaneous. The sounds of the crew commenced; a book shutting, a strangled cry from the crow's nest, a childish scream, a splash, and the sound of plates being dropped. Nami didn't peel her eyes away from the sea, but she heard their footsteps behind her.

"Nami-san!" came Sanji's voice. It still held that annoying adoration, but it was too serious to be a call for dinner.

"Nami! What happened?" Ussop shouted from the crow's nest. He had been jerked out of his doze by her alert. Whatever was going on was partially his fault, and that didn't weigh well on the sniper's conscience.

"Who fell?!" Chopper pleaded to know. His eyes were probably wide. They tended to be when danger approached.

The heat beating down on her face, Nami didn't really want to have to explain what was happening. She had hoped her remaining nakama would be able to put two and two together. Obviously, she was disappointed in this respect. Time was of the essence, though, so she merely said one word. "Zoro."

Chopper's eyes had been wide before, but they now were open to the point that his eyelids might rip. Similarly, Ussop fell from the crow's nest onto his rear end.

Sanji lit a cigarette and cocked his head.

Robin didn't do anything at all.

Nami felt her jaw fall. Zoro was out there, probably drowning, and her nakama just slowly gain their bearings? Did no one care? Not even Lu-

It then dawned on all of them at once.

The question was in all of their heads, but Sanji was the one who broke the silence, his eyebrow furrowing. "Oi. Where'd the shitty captain go?"


	3. Chapter Thrizzle

-1 The young captain of the Going Merry could admittedly say he wasn't enjoying his afternoon. Well, he would have, _if_ he was conscious. Having just been tossed unceremoniously back on the deck of his ship in a helpless state, talking was the least of his worries. Decidedly, that spot was reserved for his first mate, who was MIAS(Missing In the Action of Sleeping).

His swordsman's disappearance coincided with the disappearance of Luffy's common sense, apparently. Not that he owned a substantial amount to begin with, mind you. Fear for his nakama merely made him even less discreet. Admittedly, Luffy's concern was enough to do something very, very rash. Every devil fruit user in the entirety of the world knew the one thing they are never supposed to do. Despite the fact he received reminders of this fact daily, the idiot of a captain had leapt inside the ocean in search of Zoro.

While he had still been conscious and under the water, there was no swordsman to be seen. He had struggled to stay awake, and had remained alert for two minutes, searching frantically for his friend. Those two minutes stretched into eons, and time held still. Nothing moved; well, except for the seaweed, the ocean, the fish, and ripples of light. However, those were expected to move, and were therefore of little consequence.

"LUFFY!" Ussop's voice roared, somewhere between panic and irritation. He, along with the rest of the crew, had formed a little circle around him. The privilege of slapping Luffy across the face belonged to the sniper alone, though. The abuse in question continued for a few seconds before the captain's eyes opened lethargically for one last impact.

"Moron!" was his first greeting, soon to be followed by synonyms all around the group. Five voices, he realized, five instead of six. With that, he shut his eyes against the sun, and asked a question lightheartedly.

"Hey… Who grabbed Zoro?"

Silence. Luffy thought he might have forgotten to open his mouth when asking, so the inquiry came again.

"Hey, who grabbed Zoro?"

With silence greeting his question once again, the rubber man felt his face fall. It seemed his crew had become a sort of 'mystery deaf'. How was he going to ask for meat if they couldn't hear him?

Hart the merman was very good at his job. He took much pride in his ability to harvest gems from the seafloor. It filled him with satisfaction to know that he was productive, and the constant praise from his human partner just made it better.

Today was an especially good day for the young fish-man. The basket Hart carried in his webbed white and brown-streaked hands was full. What had made this day very special though, was that his human had donned a wetsuit and oxygen to come with him, smiling all the way. She constantly pantomimed jokes to him, and let him know how much he was needed. It warmed his cold-blooded heart to see her.

Ever since he was a fingerling, he had always been singled out for his love of humans. It had led to him being disowned and abandoned before he was even twelve years of age. His race was proud, they had shouted at him. Superior! He sure as hell didn't feel superior when diminishing the other sentiment's worth. He did feel flatulent, though. Anger tended to make him gassy- a very unbecoming trait for a merman. Then again, he was never the pick of the crop.

Between his soft amber eyes and his glossy white coral hair, he had often been confused with the female specimen growing up. Of course, they got the idea when his legs split at the age of four. For a while, he was ridiculed by his peers. They mercilessly insulted him, ripping him in every way possible, but he was a man. He never shed a tear for them. At least, that's what he had told his demanding father at the time. He was born into the puffer family, and he was NOT going to disgrace it. He did, though. That was how he had found himself diving in the middle of the sea without forethought daily. Now, watching his human make some drastically funny movements with her beautiful split legs, he had to admit life was good.

When he stopped reminiscing though, he realized something was wrong. Her hands began moving urgently, pointing towards the ocean floor. It wasn't a happy gesture, either. His gills pricked up as a chill went through him on what he was going to see. To his relief, there was no giant monster below them. It was just green sea vegetation as far as his eyes could se-wait. His eyes fell on a spiked turtle. What was a spiked turtle doing in this area of the ocean? His human slapped her goggles with frustration, and then dived past the lionfish-man like a streak.

Unfocused eyes met the human woman as she alighted on the sea floor, holding her head from the pressure change. She shook visibly. The seemingly dead man looked fierce, even tangled in seaweed. His end had been untimely, and she felt a surge of pity rush through her. By the time Hart had sped down beside her, she had picked the poor soul's scarred body out of the seaweed, and looked at her merman companion pleadingly. The face that Hart gave back signified that this was not the first time the nonverbal request had been brought up.

"Fine…." he said, his deep voice clear underwater,"-we need to drop these off anyway." The jewels in his basket threatened to topple over any moment between the jostling and diving. They were their meal ticket, boat ticket, and all around everything ticket. Their livelihood.

"Come on." Hart said more calmly now, noticing that saltwater was building up inside of the human's goggles this time. Nodding, she handed over the unfortunate seafarer and grabbed onto her aquatic friend's back. After she was secure, and careful to keep his hair-ends away from her skin, his body rocketed off the bottom. He sped through the water like a torpedo, and he could feel his human tensing incredibly beside him. It was painful for her. Sometimes he felt sorry for the species. If only the green-haired sailor had been able to breathe underwater, he wouldn't have been given water-hearse duty.

It was only a couple more seconds before they broke the surface. The human female pulled of her diving gear to breathe deeply. Hart also realized that she was leaking over the stranger. Silly humans and their leaks…

"It's okay-" the fish man said, pulling his free arms out to hug the girl, only to be startled by a convulsion from the corpse. For someone with such a deep voice, the scream that resounded was quite high-pitched. Very high pitched, actually. Had glass been present, it would have stood no chance against the mighty sound of the cowardly diver.

The human cringed as if she had just been hit by a giant's toenail clippings. Even she, the ever present maiden-in-distress , didn't scream that loud. Especially when the thing that had occurred made her happy. It had surprised her, of course, but it made her happy nonetheless.

When Hart's chest finally stopped it's annoying need to go into extremely loud cardiac arrest, he too smiled a little bit. Making contact with his partner's blue eyes, they both started laughing. They could still save the man, and the human stopped leaking.


	4. Chapter Quadrizzle in case of rap attack

-1 Waking in an unfamiliar place is considered very disorienting. For a pirate, it was part of the job. After a while, they just learned to deal with it. As a result, when Roronoa Zoro opened his eyes, he was perfectly prepared for the unknown surroundings. What he wasn't prepared for, though, was the face hovering over his.

He'd had his share of physicians in the same position, but they were all either furry or reasonably older. The person staring at him was a doe-eyed teenage girl. It was like so many nightmares he managed to obtain while napping. Next, she was probably going to lean in, and… a shudder ran through his spine at the thought.

She did nothing. She didn't even flinch. A small smile was plastered to her face, but she didn't even say anything. To Zoro, that might have been insulting his mother for the way he reacted. His hand shot out and grabbed the collar of her shirt (which was, by the way, a simple brown tee) and started demanding answers. They were the standard, of course.

"Where am I?!" he demanded, though far more serenely than his body language dictated.

"…"she said nothing, and only cocked her head.

"What am I doing here?!"

Once again, she said nothing, her short brown hair bobbing as she moved her head.

"Where are my swords?!"

When no reply came to that question, the swordsman's temper started building. You could tell because his veins started popping out, and his worry-lines deepened. The young female could tell too, and visibly tensed, but continued to be mute. She braced herself for whatever the sailor was going to say next, knowing it would be loud from the amount of breath he drew.

"WHERE THE HELL ARE MY NAKAMA?!" he asked finally, blowing her curls behind her with the sheer voice of his lungs. She shrugged. When she didn't answer again, but made a little movement he was too irritated to notice, Zoro flung the blue-eyed girl down. He didn't mean to, really, but with his brute strength, it was hard not to. She landed with a loud 'THUMP!', which was followed by the sound of someone using stairs not too far away. Whoever it was either stomped like a heavyweight, or was one.

While Zoro caught his breath, having expended every last bit of it, he heard the footsteps approach urgently towards the door to the cabin the two were in. The girl looked relieved, but Zoro had a bad feeling. It was the same feeling that he had when Tashigi approached. He was about to be thoroughly punished by karma for the misuse of his superhuman strength.

His inevitable discipline came in the form of a brawny merman who pushed the doorway, his eyes wide with worry. Zoro actually tensed further, if possible, having never seen a fish-man with that expression. It soon turned into one he recognized, however when Hart saw his human on the ground, shaking, while their charity project was standing up, his hands still outstretched like he'd tossed something. One word was uttered from the merman's pale lips. "Busted."

The thrashing that ensued was quite painful to the green-haired man, but in no way deadly. Hart had been kind enough to only use his fists. Had he brought his mane out, the former pirate hunter would have been in critical condition in a matter of seconds. Hart's partner also seemed relieved at his choice of weaponry. She hadn't rescued the pirate just to have him killed in a violent and back-handed way. Therefore, when Hart's strong hands helped her off the cabin floor, she was completely satisfied that justice had been done. Hart, on the other hand, just brimmed with confidence for having taught the stranger a lesson.

Zoro felt nothing at all, because he had been rendered unconscious by the thrashing. It was a strange world he had landed himself into. Well, to be more accurate, drowned into. You can't really land in the sea. You can sea in the sea, right? Landing, as described by the term, had something to do with land. With or without this understanding, life went on.

Yes, life did go on. From a cellular perspective, not much had changed on the Going Merry. From an subatomic perspective, however, it was massive (but since no one cares about metaphysical ramblings other than fans of the field, this phenomena shall not be described). Even so, the plane it affected the most was the ridge above Monkey D. Luffy's eyebrows.

The captain's facial expression, specifically the one he wore on his eyes, was very insightful. It could be said that the boy captain held his heart on his sleeve. This, of course, was a misconception because he avoided sleeves like they were evil incarnate. He carried it in his face, leading back to the point that had been mentioned before.

Right then, at about dawn, the captain's eyebrows were taught, aching from the strain of scanning the horizon at all times. A very unbecoming line was appearing above them, chiseling a worry mark into his features. It wasn't like him; not at all.

Normally Luffy was very happy. Exceedingly so, as a matter of fact. His optimism knew very few limits, and was often as fancy-free as a monkey on stimulants. Then again, more than just his optimism carried that characteristic. His life, his mannerisms, his very being was like a ray of light… albeit a very annoying one. When that light was mercilessly doused out of existence by something like the loss of a best friend, it was replaced with deadweight. That was ironic in itself since the young dreamer had spent so much energy convincing his remaining crew members of his first-mate's safety.

The ever-present straw hat atop Luffy's head blew slightly off-center, a warm wind caressing the muggy haze that surrounded his head. The rubber man barely reacted at first, but his hand eventually moved to put it right. All movement he mustered was sluggish and without drive. It wasn't merely because of depression, however. Nor was it from sleep deprivation. No. It was from the deprivation of the one thing the infamous Monkey D. Luffy swore he'd never go without. Meat. He had refused every meal, causing several nakama to pinch themselves, and others to get medically checked for hallucinogens. When the results were negative, most of the crew simply went about their day, confident in the swordsman's safe return.

It might have had a likeness to confidence, but Ussop was just as scared as Luffy was. In his eyes, and in the prying eyes of the navigator, this had been his fault (Sanji, on the other hand regarding him as a hero.)

What had he been doing on the watch? Sleeping. He had dozed off while doing the ONE thing that Luffy and the others had depended on him for. Granted, his self-loathing and pity might have lessened considerable if he had only thought to the cause of his mid-day drowsiness; Nami had blackmailed him into taking her watch the night before.

Nami's confidence was also an act. She was worried for Zoro. Of course she was! He was her nakama, too. It didn't matter how many times the two had threatened to kill each other, they were parts of a functioning whole! The whole was unraveling far too quickly for her to have faith in the stupid first mate at all. She hated him for this. She hated Ussop for this. Most of all, though, she hated herself for this.

In all that time they'd spent together, she had never even uttered a single compliment to the poor guy's face. The last conversation they had was about interest rates that he was paying to her after a lucrative set-up she'd lured him into. It wasn't his fault he was wired that way, right? Obviously he was just dropped too many times as a child. As for his scary face, it was probably just genetics giving him a bad hand!

Nami's pen tapped the still-blank parchment. If only to at least keep things semi-normal, she had to carry on with normalcy. So why couldn't she simply take the ruler and pen to make a line? It wasn't hard! She did it daily! She urged, and her hand didn't respond. Unfortunately, her urging had the effect of breaking the pen. Ink shot all over her hands and onto her clothes. In a huff, she wandered off to wash her hands and try again.

The constantly observant cook watched the navigator as she struggled to complete her simple task. Of all the crew, his confidence in the shitty swordsman was probably the highest. It wasn't because he liked him, of course. Quite the opposite. He merely knew that the bastard was too tenacious to die that easily. It would be too easy for him. He couldn't help but feel pity for the flustered Nami, though. Without even realizing what his hands had begun, Sanji mopped up the ink from the floor.

As for the rest of the crew, Chopper was gullible and Robin was apathetic, so that was that-"that" being a verbal variable meaning something else in every respect. Without the word "that", writing becomes a tedious affair which can be blamed on the emphasis of the word in most English dialects. In this particular case, "that" being 'that' was supposed to mean that the two were satisfied and fully efficient despite the lack of Zoro's presence. Either because they believed the captain where he didn't himself, or because they simply didn't care one way or the other. The prize for being a keen observer of the obvious is to be rewarded to whomever assigns those reasons correctly.

* * *

Ramblings from the deviating deity what writes this crap indicate that she wants reviews and a taco. Whichever comes first shall have her undivided attention and may cause the next chapter to come faster. Stop throwing away aluminum cans!: D 


	5. Ch5: In Which Stuff Happens

-1 Two hours elapsed before Roronoa Zoro opened his eyes again. His position hadn't changed from the last time he awoke. His katana were gone, and two blue doe-like eyes bore into his face once more. At first, he thought it was déjà vu. He was pretty ready to wager that once again, as he opened his mouth to speak, he would get no reply from the seemingly mute female hovering over him.

"Whe-" his lips formed the syllables, only to be cut off by a somewhat deeper, masculine voice that caused him to shudder.

"Where are you?" came Hart's reasonably cautious tone. The wounded sailor who had proved violent earlier was far too close to his only nakama for the merman's comfort. Still, she couldn't be dissuaded from leaving his side. It irked the mermish outcast quite a bit. In fact, his bodily language might have even betrayed a flash of his concern.

Zoro's eyes flared for a moment, startled at the communication that had taken its sweet time in coming.

"Yeah, that." he said, visibly relaxing. His fists that had been balled before untangled themselves, revealing open hands.

Blinking his tired eyes, Hart shrugged. In a twist of irony, he knew EXACTLY where they were. What eluded him was the ability to explain it to this human. They were near the darkened wreck, equidistant to two reefs, and at least three days away from the nearest island. On that note, he really didn't know the name of the island either, but he knew that the two of them bought groceries there about a week beforehand. The shopping trip had turned into quite an adventure, too, but that was irrelevant to their location. Helplessly, he looked at his female counterpart. She pantomimed something with callused hands, and he groaned.

"I'll go get the map. It'll only take a second." the lionfish-man mumbled, not taking his eyes off Zoro. In the span of thirty milliseconds, Hart managed to make the largest nonverbal threat he had ever made to anyone in his reasonably short life. 'If you touch her, you're dead. Then, after you're dead, I'm going to hunt down everything you hold dear and destroy it'.

Zoro tensed. He might not have understood the death glare word-for-word, but he got the general gist of it. Noticing that Hart was waiting for a response, the former pirate hunter gave a curt nod. With that, Hart stormed out of the room as quickly as he had entered. This just left the silent chick. Akward silence reigned.

Having nothing better to do, Zoro studied his hostess for a second. His eyebrow quirked a little when he noticed she was staring back. It wasn't quite scrutinizing, and he inwardly thanked his luck that she wasn't checking him out, either. Her eyes were just there, boring into him.

"…What?" he finally asked, knowing full well that she wasn't going to answer his question. He was almost smug over the fact.

"Treasure." she said in a voice that sounded far more normal than anything he would assume could come out of the oddity's mouth. It startled him. It made him irritated. Between the two, it did the latter more. A bead of sweat fell down his forehead from this new chain of events. Once again, silence reigned.

"Treasure." came that voice again, this time grating into his nerves. Wasn't she supposed to be mute? In the heat of the moment, he almost said something vulgar, but was interrupted by a loud sound. A rather voluminous one, at that.

It was the sound of a fart. Not just any fart, either. No, this was the Grand Line, filled with mystery and intrigue. If it could be said, the sound that just ensued was an 'ultra' fart. Thunderous and loud, it caused Zoro to flinch for what must have been the fourth time that day. A horrible fume filled the air. The female sitting next to him didn't even bother reacting, like this was a normal occurrence. What had he gotten himself into?

"Found it!" came a muscular voice from above, accompanied by the sound of a drawer slamming. There was no sound insulation in the boat, Zoro then noted. He'd have to be careful if the two ended up being his enemies, or worse… if they found his wanted poster.

Hart's thunderous footsteps went down some stairs, and then abruptly came to a halt before the open door.

"We're near F!" he shouted, excited at his accomplishment. It was quite a contrast to Zoro's reaction, which ranged somewhere between questioning the merman's literacy, and wondering where the hell his nakama were.

"F, huh?" Zoro asked apathetically.

Silence once again took over, the sound of the waves presiding over it all.

"TREASURE!" the anonymous female shouted once again, this time causing BOTH her male companions to flinch. Hart's eye twitched, but soon was replaced with a sort of anticipation. It'd been a while since his little wealth detector said it with such conviction The girl's finger slowly rose, indicating the location of the item she'd been speaking of. Hart held his breath, and Zoro swore inwardly. She was pointing at him. Tensely, the pirate waited for the epiphany, the loud conclusion that the two were going to turn him in; or for her to pull a poster out of her belt, or something. The something didn't come, leaving a very bewildered swordsman baffled and a tad disappointed in his lack of ability to predict things..

Hart wore a very puzzled expression. Was the man holding jewels? He didn't seem especially important. In fact, he just seemed like a face that the fish man had seen around town. She'd never failed him before, though. Then, some idea dawned on him.

"Oh! The treasure is that way!" he said, almost like a placating elder sibling. Zoro let out an audible sigh of relief at this, causing Hart to look at him suspiciously. The girl grinned, nodding slowly.

With that, Zoro stood up, his patience with the situation diminishing. Of all the people he had to be rescued by, it had to be a mental couple of divers. The girl was probably brain damaged from being underwater too long. Pfft.

"Listen… could you guys just drop me off at the next island? I have some business to take care of." he said, crossing his arms. He had to find the Going Merry, for one, and…

"Um… sure." Hart murmured. He was pretty sure that rescues didn't usually turn out like that, but it wasn't as if he enjoyed the other male's company.

"…Who are you, anyway?"

That caught Zoro off guard. He considered a moment before deciding to use an alias. It never escaped his lips, though, because right then, Ms. Mute decided to yell again.

"Zoro!"

Hart jumped, looking apprehensively from the man he now recognized from his posters, and then to his human counterpart. Three words came to mind. Whose mind it came to is still being discerned, but they became the closing words to the chapter.

'WHAT THE HELL?'


	6. Ch6 In Which More Stuff Happens

-1The air was heavy around the Going Merry. It was heaviest near the surface of the ocean due to surface tension and gravity, but it felt the worst around the captain of the small vessel. His straw hat had concealed his eyes dutifully for the past two days, leaving his world feeling estranged and alienated (not to mention leaving his head itchy and malodorous). The world didn't enjoy this treatment, of course, and had rebelled by making the weather as miserable for the boy as it could possibly have been for the past few hours.

The rain dripped off the straw matting, slid over the ribbon, and soaked hair that looked like it hadn't been combed in eons. Waves invaded over the siding, taking a few barrels for an underwater ride. Despite the rocking of the boat, pun intended, the somewhat unintelligent Paramecian didn't budge an inch, causing his nakama no end of trouble.

"Shitty captain! HEY! Get off the frikkin' deck!" came the cook's voice, as irritable as it had been for a while now. In his defense, this was his third time shouting the same phrase. The fact that his friend hadn't been answering him left him agitated. It was a rare occasion that the captain was TOLERATED in the galley, let alone invited into it.

The chef had been both insulted an alarmed by Luffy's recent behavior. The rubber man hadn't eaten. Well, he had, but not in the usual heaping portions that should have been donated to feed an entire country. Even two days of this had caused the poor kid to look emaciated. The helpings he had denied were of Sanji's creation, too. The captain himself had boasted that his cook was the best. Why the hell wouldn't he be hungry?!

Sanji knew the answer to that, too. It didn't make him happier, but he knew that the marimo was to blame. Luffy wouldn't admit it aloud, but he was worried. More worried than he should be for the beef-headed swordsman. How else could the death-grip he had on Wadou be explained? There was another way for it to be explained, as a note, but as it was highly unlikely and involved a body switch, Sanji didn't even bother mentally listing it.

A lighter was soon lifted in Sanji's fingers, flicking a small flame into a short existence to ignite an old and detrimental habit.

"Luffy! Come on!" urged a rather tousled sniper, rings under his eyes. He was wearing his goggles, but that was only to protect against the ongoing volley of raindrops. Vigilance had become his new middle name, both in his actions and the amusing stories he'd told to a young reindeer and a bemused captain. Compensation always had a price, however, and he was paying it with denying himself even more precious sleep.

"LUFFY!" echoed a small reindeer, hooves twitching nervously. The young Zoan knew the consequences of the waves swirling around those sandaled feet quite well. Why was he even doing that to himself? What was he so fixated on that he would do such a thing?!

Sanji grunted, having had enough of this. When the next wave came to try it's luck, he found himself barreling towards the red-vested pirate, aiming a swift kick at his mid-section.

Luffy was airborne for a few seconds before slamming through the open doorway, plowing into an unsuspecting Ussop. The was a scream, a clatter, and a crash. Somewhere in the kitchen, a glass broke. Then, for a moment, there was silence, accompanied by the sound of a page turning.

"Someone haul their butt in here and help me with the helm!" Nami shouted from another location on the ship. Sanji immediately started, but was halted by a spontaneously-spawned female hand.

"I'll get it, cook-san." she said simply, putting her book down on the table beside the twitching sniper.

"Robinchwan is so helpful!" he crooned for a second, eyeing her with adoration as she left the room. Once her absence was noted, though, his expression quickly fell again. Something had to be done about the captain. The attitude he was showing was not adequate, and Sanji was sick of picking up the slack. Pausing, he took a quick puff of his cancer-stick to prepare him for the job ahead. He slowly turned around to witness his leader flat on his back, sleeping like a baby with Wadou cradled in his arms.

The dartboard-esque eyebrow furrowed, confused. On cue, Chopper was examining the sleeping figure.

"I think he's been asleep for a while." the miniature doctor commented, propping up a rubber eyelid to examine the eye beneath before snapping it back on. The snoozing Luffy made a quick, garbling protest, and wiggled around to sleep the other way, water dripping off him.

Very carefully, Chopper poked some of the water with his left hoof, bringing it to his tongue. A quick lick of the substance caused him to swoon a little, Sanji catching him before he fell.

"Something in the water, eh?" Sanji asked a little blearily. Relief flooded through him now that he knew his difficult task was unnecessary.

"Uh…yeah." Chopper answered, sleepy. He fell asleep quickly in the cook's gentle grasp until Sanji realized something.

"RobinCHWAN!" he quickly shouted, dropping an unconscious Chopper on the wooden floor like a rock, forgotten. Whatever was going on was sapping the devil-fruit users of their strength, and there was a third such person on the ship. A female someone, actually. In Sanji's mind, that gave her priority. As stupid as it was, he left three helpless nakama unconscious on the galley floor while he charged out to check on his beloved historian and navigator.

"SANJI-KUN!" yelled a very frightened Nami-swan, adding velocity to his adrenaline rush. He flew down the stairs, in fact.

After an intense sprint to the helm, the blonde male dropped his cigarette out of his mouth. His two precious women were fine. No, they were pointing behind him, where the window on their door was.

At first, it had been hard to make it out through the rain. He had been too focused on the girls to notice the black-sailed pirate fleet looming close to the vulnerable Merry. Aside from that, the rain had only reduced the visibility. He hoped it would be the same for the group of ships approaching, but knew otherwise when a latern was blinked, burning a signal from the fore of the lead ship. It was a huge lantern, and there was probably about four men holding it, but it was blinked for him.

"Oi! Marim-Wait, LUFFY! …Oh, yeah…Ussop! Chopper!" Of course, no one came to the young man's aid, what with the being unconscious and all. If those pirates outside were competent at all, they were screwed. Well, that's how you would simply put their true situation, which was 'altogether helpless and without any sort of hope in the case of aggression from an opposing force that probably was beyond the strength of the semi-perverted gentleman of a chef'. So, yes, they were very screwed. Very screwed, indeed.

Somewhere below the ship, a small fish was eaten by a bigger fish.

"Damn."

"What the hell?!" Hart shouted, his outburst sounding loud enough to be a roar. Before he knew what he was doing, the merman swept his strong hands around the unfortunate pirate's shirt. Soon, he was shaking Zoro by the scruff of his neck like a rag doll. He didn't even know what questions he was asking the man, then, but they were important, and vital to his continued survival.

The swordsman didn't even bother lifting a hand to defend himself. He could take whatever that beast dished out. Even so, he did wonder what the burlish creature was shouting at him. All he heard was incoherent babbling(though he did pick up phrases that sounded very remotely like a song he'd once heard about a budgie-breeder).

The silent partner of the out-of-control merman finally stepped in, looking more embarrassed than someone with her assumed level of brainwave activity should. Gingerly at first, her right index finger began tapping the rampaging Hart's shoulder. When the was ineffective, it slowly increased in pressure until it turned into a full-blown blow.

"Ow. Hey!" Hart groaned, his tirade silenced by his human partner. He dropped Zoro and rubbed his shoulder. That kinda hurt… He scowled at her, and some sort of nonverbal communication once again commenced. It was quite vivacious, too. His body language insinuated that whatever she was telling him through her stare was a very, very bad idea.

"Gaaah! FINE!" Hart finally relented, throwing his hands up in the air. His human gave a triumphant smile, and the infamous Roronoa Zoro looked on, waiting for the results of the outcome.

Hart opened his mouth to speak, but not after turning to voice his plea silently to the girl one more time. The shoulder-dropping that followed indicated the futility of the merman's situation.

"We're not kicking you off the ship, pirate." Hart grudgingly muttered, his voice slightly dangerous. "-and we're taking you to F."

"F?" Zoro asked again, peering from the smiling human to her partner suspiciously. "..What is F?"

"The island with the smelters." Hart replied quickly.

"Smelters?" Zoro pressed on, expecting to find his nakama on the island. He needed to know the surroundings to know where to find them. If it was a pirate town, he'd guess whatever restaurant was the biggest, or wherever there was cheap meat. If it was a marine base, he'd check the cell block. Nothing quite prepared him for the answer.

"-Oh, yeah. The sea-stone smelters."


	7. Chapter 7

The captain of the as-of-yet unnamed pirates that had accosted Merry was a very intimidating man. At his height, it was hard not to be. His rich dark skin bore countless scars in many different shapes., and his muscles were thick underneath them. Meaty hands drummed on the surface of his rather large chair, and the giant of a man looked down at his new acquisitions, black locks falling over his face.

He didn't know what to make of them. The crew he had on the floor of his quarters was well-known in the Grand Line for its' strength and vivacity. They weren't showing either characteristic right then, and he found it unsettling that someone with a higher bounty than him was sprawled behind a woman like a coward, and at the same time sleeping like a baby. Of course, being familiar with their particular location on the Grand Line, the reason was obvious. The seastone sediment in the rains knocked out devil-fruit users like a plague.

"So…" the man boomed, his rich and middle-aged voice filling the closed cabin, causing all the inhabitants to flinch a little. Captain or no, the volume of his voice had to be worked on.

"So?" came a calm reply from the resident chef of the Straw Hats. With Zoro gone, and with Luffy out of commission, Sanji had to take the plate and talk to the man. His precious Nami would be too busy calculating the situation at first, as she always did. The very thought filled him with pride. She was always so clever!

As if she knew he was thinking about her, the orange-loving navigator scooted further away from the man in the black suit.

"…Er…"their captor stammered, unsure of how to deal with the current situation. He had a reason for bringing them aboard, obviously. Communicating it would be hard without some ground rules set for their meeting. For all his captives knew, his motives involved vengeance for the cabbage they ate last week. Little known, however, was that a being had already attempted that route, and had ended up a piece of art on the bottom of Sanji's shoe.

The select crewmembers of the large pirate that had come into the room with the prisoners as guards gulped a little. It had been twenty minutes now, and hardly anything had been accomplished. The men were happy that the crew of the Going Merry had come so peacefully, but they were unsure of how much longer the truce would last at this rate. Even though the captain was out of it, the man with freakish eyebrows seemed pretty formidable.

"Can we go now?" Sanji asked carefully, pulling an unlit cigarette from his pants pocket. He didn't have a lighter, but it still made him feel better to have it pressed firmly between his lips.

"Um, no." came the captain's slightly exasperated rebutle. He opened his mouth to attempt to make conversation again when the door behind his captives opened to reveal a female pirate that looked even more formidable than the captain, albeit much smaller, thinner, paler, and without scars. She did have a sword out and at the ready, though.

"William, you're hopeless." she sighed, pushing past a swooning Sanji and stepping on a sleeping rubber face in heels. Luffy didn't stir, which caused a little vein of worry to course through the navigator, who had been watching her captain closely in the hopes that he would once again play the knight in shining armor, instead of the sleeping beauty(somewhat because of the fact he didn't play the part well while sprawled and indifferent).

Nami looked from her captain's newly indented face to the back of the newcomer from her place on the floor. Something about the aura that surrounded the woman made her want to see who she was dealing with. A loose skirt met her eyes, emblazoned with the jolly roger that tradition demanded. The skin that showed from her hands and arms was incredibly pale, though marred from place to place by spots of freckles. Frizzy brown hair came down to her shoulders where skin hung a little more loose around the muscle than it probably had ten years prior. From this inspection, Nami determined the woman to be about forty-five or so.

"I heard from Gulabi that you were having a hard time with the captives, but this I was not expecting." the woman said, her blue eyes flashing with annoyance. "They probably don't know what the hell you're thinking! Heck, I don't know what the hell you're thinking!"

The giant man who was apparently called William slouched, a hand over his face. Underneath them, a scarlet flush came over his cheeks. Damn that woman! She was right, though. Just like she always seemed to be. No use arguing. His palm brushed his graying goatee on the way back to the chair.

"Deidre, for heaven's sakes…" he groaned, prepared for the shove to the shoulder he was about to receive. After a few moments, it came with a passion, just like everything else he was given by that woman. Then again, that was probably why he loved her.

"Don't you 'Deirdre' me, William!" she shouted, her pale face turning red in the blink of an eye. "Our goal is simple! Why do you always manage to-" she stopped short, her hands on William's chest in a compromising position. They had an audience! How had she forgotten that? That was why the spat had begun in the first place, wasn't it? In the blink of an eye, the impulsive anger was gone, and she was a polite distance away from her captain. Instead of yelling, she suddenly began placidly speaking with him in a hushed tone.

Sanji tilted his head to the side, studying the scene before him. He managed to hit his head against the newly-conscious sniper, who sputtered before complaining.

"Ow! Sanji!"

"Hey, Ussop." he greeted, a little irritated at being distracted.

"What happened?" the village liar asked, whispering every word. "Where are we? What's wrong with Chopper and Luffy?!" he asked, his voice suddenly becoming more voluminous. The questions would have probably continued if the discussion in front of them hadn't ended abruptly with the sounds of a slap to the back and a manly yelp.

William twitched, his hands traveling to a slip of paper under his chair. It was brought out in a singly jerky movement, and then unfurled in front of questioning eyes to reveal a newspaper article. With all the drama that had surrounded it, Nico Robin had at least expected something impressive. A bounty, a giant monster, or maybe some sort of treasure map. The surprise on the faces of the Straw Hats in the room was imaginable, jaws dropped, etc. The headline wasn't amazing. It was odd and stupid, and wasn't even from a national post.

The headline consisted of only a few words. 'Merman Wreaks Havoc in Local Market'. The cabin was uneasy and quiet before a few chuckles escaped. The thought of an entire pirate fleet searching for one merman whose greatest crime was robbing a fruit stand was pretty entertaining.

"Oh, come on!" Deirdre sputtered, one hand on her hips. A ringed finger motioned to the pictures underneath the headline. One was predictable; a fierce-looking merman made a scowl for the lense. The other, though, was obviously the reason for all the current hullabaloo. There, where Deirdre was pointing, was a picture of a rather innocent-looking human girl with short frizzy hair, and a complexion similar to hers.

Her face was puzzled in the photo, her neck turned as if she was already moving when the photograph was taken. The caption under her simply read 'female accomplice'. Sanji didn't bother reading them, though. The subject was female, so he had to really get a feel for the art.

"They used a crappy lense." he muttered, obviously not getting the point.

"Have you seen her?" William asked, his voice once again far louder than it should be. His generic crewmembers grimaced at the sound.

The alert Straw Hat pirate members looked from one another, and then shrugged.

"Sorry, but I don't think so. I would remember meeting such a stunning beauty." Sanji finally said, dramatically putting a flourish on the last two words.

"No he wouldn't." Ussop muttered in Nami's general direction.

"What was that, you shitty long-nose?!"

"NOTHING!"

Deirdre's face fell, her self-indulgence fading. "Well, if you do.. Just… We're looking for her."

William just threw his hands up in defeat. Both adults looked depressed , and their crew followed suit. Weapons were lowered as Deidre's hands started to wring at once another, her shoulders shaking. Seeing thes, William stood in front of her and motioned to Sanji.

"Go." he ordered the confused chef and company, more quietly than anything he had said so far.

"Wha..?" Ussop asked, getting a slight handle on the situation. Enough to notice that this wasn't normal, at least. Not even for them.

"Take your ship and go." William roared, pointing to the sea outside. Deirdre was obviously crying now, but her captain shielded her from sight. Frustration and grief welled up in his eyes. "GO!" he yelled again, this time greeted with results.

Ussop grabbed Chopper and ran outside, where the rain had finally stopped. Sanji grabbed the captain and followed suit.

No one hindered them when they treaded quickly across the deck. Merry was still docked where they had left her, and no one had disturbed the little ship as far as they could tell. A rope ladder was lowered by a rather hairy teenage boy to allow them passage.

Sanji didn't bother with the ladder for the captain. He'd survived worse falls. After he heard his former back weight fall to the wooden deck below with a THUMP, Sanji moved aside to let the others pass. Ussop and Chopper shimmied down, and Sanji turned around to usher his precious ladies forward. Predictably for the reader, but not for him, they weren't there. The space that should have been occupied by supple breasts and beautiful long lashes was taken by a smelly mop and bucket that was removed several seconds later by a pudgy guy with a thick mustache.

"Nami-swan? Robin-Chwan?" he asked, a little breathlessly. Where did they go?

Robin had never left the cabin, but she had stood up. Nami had done so as well, both being somewhat smarter than their male counterparts. Nami had looked at the girl in the picture and noticed the connection to Deirdre immediately. Robin had been able to piece it together as well. If it had been a boy in the picture instead, Sanji probably would have figured it out. Deirdre was a mother.

William's connection was trickier, and still spotty in places, but somewhat evident in the way he was cradling Deirdre in his strong arms as she cried more. There was so much affection in that gesture that the nakama of the pirate king assumed that the two were lovers. When a glint came off of the captain's wedding ring finger, it was confirmed. Still, the girl in the picture hadn't really looked like him. The equation was still lacking something crucial. William probably didn't sire the girl. Even so, he seemed to honestly and truly care.

It might have pulled at a few initial heartstrings, but Nami was still Nami. A brilliant idea flashed into her head.

"Why-" William asked, taking in a deep breath to steady his voice before shouting again,"-are you still here?"

Thinking quickly, Nami answered before Robin had a chance to.

"We're looking for someone too, you know." she said casually, completely disregarding the angst emanating from the middle-aged couple.

William suddenly appeared interested. Was this young woman about to propose…?

"We can help." Joy filled his ribcage, and he was about to fling an outrageously loud call of gratitude in her direction before she added her bit.

"-for a price."


	8. Chapter A'aight FLASHBACK!

Captain William Wall-eye of the Freedom Pirates had his own file cabinet in the World Government's database. While he had no bounty, the man had left quite a mess in his wake. Every situation that had ever involved him had buckled under his might like a block tower to a toddler; quite loudly, and all but inconspicuous. For that reason, and that reason alone, he was not advertised by the government as a villain or otherwise.

The reason for the man's exclusion from regular mug shots was simple. William knew something that no one on the outside world was supposed to know. It was a dark secret, but wasn't one that involved treasure or royalty. To the contrary, it all began with a simple exchange of words from the mouth of an arrogant explorer of the Grand Line and a marine officer about a hundred years prior.

* * *

"This place is a dump. You really should do something about it. Even animals don't wanna live here…" the blonde man said nonchalantly from behind bifocals, shrugging and looking at his militant escort from the wasteland before them. It had been that way naturally, it seemed. The natural wildlife consisted of carrion birds that dropped by from time to time, and there was a solitary dead tree in the center. The place reeked of sulfur.

"Yeah…"

The bearded man beside the scholar stroked his facial hair softly, humming in thought. Recently, the exploration flagship had taken several savage pirates in custody. Currently, they were just taking up space, akin to the dead tree in the vast expanse of infertile dirt. He opened his mouth to speak, but the blonde bespectacled male beside him spoke at the same time. They were going to abandon the criminals at that very spot and return for them later.

To the misfortune of the poor souls(and the not-so-poor souls) marooned on the wasteland, 'later' meant several months, and very few of them survived by hard toil and dumb luck. When a marine fleet returned to bring them to justice, they were surprised to see a small but thriving community of convicts. Somehow or another, they had managed to get the earth to yield them crops, and actually managed to get seed as well.

Unanimously the marines concluded that the criminals in question were far too resourceful to be hung or decapitated, as was the custom. No, they had something far more crafty in mind. With blessing from the heads of the united government, they were able to build something unprecedented.

A city was raised, walls high and powerful as the backs that broke to build it; those of slaves to their own deeds. Criminals and pirates were sent to this prison for a full twelve years, Impel Down forgotten like an old toy of the sadistic system. Their numbers reached over two thousand at one point, causing officials some alarm as their disgruntled unpaid servants began their first uprising. It was quelled quickly enough, the death toll less than fifty, but its legacy remained. Impel Down was once again fully utilized, and the doors to the labor camp were forced shut to future delinquents. Incidentally, they were also shut to those born within the giant prison settlement.

The next generation of the city were both like and unlike any other children. They played, they ate, they whined about toys and clung to their mothers like a burr to a dog. They had dreams, ambitions, and places they wanted to go. Their eyes would shine when offered a sweet or present, and they often shirked and cursed their parents in their adolescent years. Unlike other children, however, were their reasons for resentment.

Unethical and inhumane as it was, the general public and federal society were quite fond of cheap labor. So fond, in fact, that life sentences carried on into the next generation. This fact was uproarious to the public at first, but after a few cover-ups and years of such records having been lost, the island of Fortuna's Tear was supposedly erased from the map. Unfortunately, the map-maker who started the next standard map didn't erase the name all the way. The letter 'F' remained.

'F' was widely regarded as an error in the mapmaking process. This fact alone saved the poor employee from his superior's retribution. People traveling the Grand Line often avoided it, having been taught in school that the log pose pointed in that direction because of the strange chemical activity happening in that corner. At first, that was a lie, but several generations later, that wasn't too far off the mark.

'F' had evolved over the years, its servitude harnessed for the new age. Old factories were burned to the ground and demolished to make way for yet another revolutionary device; the sea-stone smelter. Three giant stacks now embellished the décor of the hidden prison, mountainous in size to be capable of meeting the military's need for the new weapon. Men, women, and children worked on it day and night, their shifts cruel and long. They were a people resigned to their fates. If they were lucky, they were allowed out of the main city to the area accessible to the public. Luxuries like food and clean water were given to such individuals, so as not to give away the government's dirty little secret.

F was a very bleak place. For nearly a hundred years, no one ever escaped alive. So, the surprise of the guards that had faithfully kept the place under padlock, key, lock, another key, another lock, and another key was quite great. If the public got wind of the plight of the plight of the guiltless slave generations of F, bad things would happen. Even Dragon would get involved, most likely. So, notoriety for the rebels was out of the question. Only government officials of a high rank were allowed to touch the file for obvious reasons. Were they to read them, they would see the face of the captain standing before the historian of the future pirate king. William Wall-eye the giant, the man who led his people from their unjust shackles. Of course, everything after the name was omitted for even more obvious reasons involving a conspiracy theorist armed with a screwdriver. Okay, well maybe they weren't so obvious. In fact, they were almost pointless in mentioning.

((A/N: My bad. Also, sorry about this chapter, but it was kinda important for the whole plot thing. If you can find the jokes I placed, good for you. If you can't, congrats. You're reasonably normal. Also, for those of you with a short attention span, I'm _sooooo _sorry you had to read this at all.))


	9. Chapter 9

On a small vessel, storms can be perilous. With skilled enough sailors, however, it can be made much less a trial of luck and more into a trial of strength. The same could be said of both the ships our protagonist frequented, whether it was the Going Merry or Lively Fishwife, which was in fact the name of the boat he was currently trying to assist through gusty winds and rain.

The wood rocked violently beneath his feet, but it was not the worst battering he had endured in such a situation. In fact, this storm, if it weren't for the sheer power of it forcing him to work, would have been something the man could have very easily slept through.

"Come on, Lazy-bones!" he could hear Hart's incredibly irritated shouts in his direction. "Tie down those lines!"

"You're one to talk!" replied the addressed, laughing spitefully. "Where's that set of rain ponchos you promised? Your silent partner is shivering in her boots!"

The saltwater splashed into Zoro's mouth as a wave threatened to overturn the Fishwife like a paper plate in the wind.

"You people are always complaining about all the damn water," Hart grumbled as the wave washed off the deck, leaving the three people on it even more saturated than before. "-yet you insist on travelling the seas with your vessels, even though this terrain is unnatural to you."

The only female on board looked down from the helm to Hart with a frown. As if feeling her eyes upon him, he looked up to her with a sigh and added,"-well, unnatural to most of you, anyway."

The frown persisted, and Hart threw his large hands up to his shoulders. "Well, what would you say? You, of all women, should understand this speech."

Zoro rolled his eyes. He couldn't care less about what the two would say to each other (or, more accurately, what Hart would say). He just wished they'd pay more attention to the ocean.

"Look, are you two going to bicker, or are you going to keep your eyes on the freaking horizon?!" he bellowed, unaccustomed to being the voice of reason in any situation. Suddenly, he felt a surge of sympathy for the bitch he called a navigator on the Merry.

"Bah, stop being so nit-picky!" Hart retorted, returning to the necessary tasks that would keep the Fishwife afloat. "We're almost there, anyway!"

"How can you tell in all this," Zoro had to stop to spit some saltwater out of his mouth once more,"-in all this rain?"

"Well, I live out here, moron." Hart answered curtly, ignoring the incredulous look on the swordsman's face. "I live out here, and the island is visible to anyone with half a brain."

"Where is it, then?" Zoro asked with frustration, squinting through the rain to see the horizon.

"About thirty feet from the opposite side of the boat," was the amused reply.

A vein popped out of the pirate's forehead. Granted, it was hard to make out the entire shape of the island, but the smokestacks and large gates were a looming shadow behind what looked like a more vibrant community. One that had a harbor that opened in less than ten meters. How long had they been there, anyway?

"And why didn't you tell me this earlier?"

"The lookout can't shout land-ho." Hart said simply.

"Well, she seems to have a fully operational voicebox to me."

"A puzzle to us all. Now stop yer' yammering and prepare to dock." Hart ordered and promptly dived into the ocean. Zoro was soon greeted with the sensation of the boat being moved from underwater as the powerful swimmer pushed it through the turbulent ocean into the nearby bay.

"If you have a piece of intel, you act on it." Nami grumbled, leaving the cabin of Wall-Eye's ship with a grimace. It was official…

_I am surrounded by idiots._

If the paper came from a community, you visit that community. If your origin story is left with loose ends, you revisit it. From the information the navigator was able to gather in bits and pieces about the ship, it wasn't a hard deduction to make that perhaps Deirdre's daughter, Parvati, had left the ship on purpose. It was also a reasonable conclusion to think that, possibly, said girl was sailing around nearby, and probably had to port into the only island in the vicinity to get fresh water from time to time. As there were only a few nearby islands, and the primary port was a cover village for one of the most corrupt operations on the planet, and incidentally home to the rest of Parvati's enslaved brethren, she probably would return to said place from time to time.

"They have the resources to handle something this small…" the red-head groaned,"-all they had to do was send a merchant that passed through to each island with a message to give the innkeepers. Bribes too, probably, but not much."

Robin smiled from behind the navigator, patting her friend on the back. "You forget these people have a mission of their own, Nami. They can't very well put the money they've gathered for the sake of freeing the rest of their people into sponsoring you."

Nami halted, her fury for the denial of payment or her services abating. "Wait a minute, Robin. We have to dock at this island, don't we?"

"It is inevitable, yes. We will have to purchase new supplies, as well as search for Swordsman-san."

Her hands balled into fists. "What are the chances that Luffy won't find out about this base's oppression of the people?"

Robin closed her eyes thoughtfully. "Oh, I'd say the chances are very slim. You know our captain."

"Okay, new question. Given the large amounts of effort these people are exerting to free themselves, what are the chances the idiot will let it stand?"

The archeologist's smile faded. "Oh, I doubt he'd let this stand at all."

Nami turned around. "He's not a champion of justice. If he isn't pulled into it, don't you think that maybe… just maybe we can get away this time without getting involved?"

Robin turned her head. "I was more curious as to when he woke up, you know. How much he heard…"

"Oh, you saw him. He was sleeping like a babe." Nami growled. "I'm going to fix that now, if you'll excuse me."

With that, the temperamental navigator stormed off the deck of William's ship onto the waiting Merry. Nico Robin followed the younger woman with her eyes, surprised at the ignorance of the normally bright Nami.

"Oh, navigator-san… He's not a genius, but he's certainly more capable than you give him credit for." She chuckled, all too aware that Luffy had been awake for a fraction of the conversation from the way his snoring had switched in rhythm. "There's more to intelligence than the ability to comprehend what is done or said."

"Miss," a young boy called Robin out of her musings,"-if you find Parvati, please don't make her come back here."

"Oh?" the black-haired woman looked at the child who approached her. His wild curly hair was a golden brown, much like his skin. "-and why is that?"

"She was sad here. I could see it in her eyes." He responded with a shake of his head. "Ma… Ma depended on her too much."

"Hmm." Robin placed her hand to her chin. "Is that so?"

"Rahda! It's time for your mapping lessons!" a man called across the deck. The boy turned away from Robin and ran to the instructor, who looked as normal as any on the boat.

"Rahda…" Robin memorized the name. "I suppose this gets more and more interesting."

Luffy had been drifting in and out of sleep for some time. He had awoken for a span during the meeting on the galleon, but had been too exhausted to do much but listen. Like Zoro after a night of hard drinking, it was hard to shake off the buzz of whatever had entered his system the night before. Of course, that was about to clear, though not before returning the pang of his first mate's possible demise.

Cold hands gripped the scruff of his vest and lifted him off the ground violently, jerking and shaking him. He smelled oranges, built the bridge, and quickly roused himself.

"Naa! Nami!" he greeted with a wide grin, ignoring every single uncomfortable bit of her grip, which had grabbed some of the elastic skin of his chest and pulled it forward.

"Luffy, you twit! You're the captain, so act like it!" she admonished before dropping him like a load of bricks.

"Ah! Nami-swan is so attractive when she's shrieking in anger!" Sanji cooed, only to see the look on Luffy's face. It wasn't normal, yet again, neither was the fact that Sanji cared enough to look. His captain bit his lip and looked down, eyebrows furrowed. Sensing Sanji's eyes on him, however, Luffy returned his face to a cheerful neutral.

"Sanji, we need to get more meat, right?"

"Well, you haven't eaten it all, so no." Sanji replied without thinking, and slapped a hand over his face in regret as his captain ran to the kitchen.

"Get back here! LUFFY!" Sanji bellowed, running into the galley to reveal an empty fridge. Too late.

"Amg, Snnji." Luffy greeted with all of the missing food in his mouth, stretching it grotesquely. "It shmms winrrd trmrk prt."

Nami heard this from the deck and felt the blood freeze in her veins.

The captain swallowed too much, and tears formed in the corners of his eyes from the discomfort. "-let's go to the nearest island."


End file.
